Diagnosis: Squishy Monsteritis

 This morning I had my pre-op physical and my Lil Cupcake just had to come along.

 

 Ugh, the dreaded scale...I about hyper ventilated when the nurse said "Please step on the scale". However, I maintained my composer and politely declined (like I ALWAYS do). The nurse's head turned around so quickly, it wouldn't surprise me if he is suffering whiplash this evening. He insisted weighing me was necessary due to needing anesthesia for the surgery. I grudgingly climbed on the "depress-o-meter" backwards and told him to not tell me the number and to "clear" the scale before I got off of it. That way I wouldn't have to except how much weight I have gained due to not being able to run the past 6 weeks. 

 After the trauma of being weighed, I had some other stupid stuff done, like blood pressure and pulse taking. Cupcake and I got REALLY bored with all of the lame stuff, so we decided we needed some imitation latex glove balloons.

 

(These are not nearly as fun or great as the latex ones) 

(She was happy with hers)

More boredom, so some knee shots to memorialize these HOT pre- surgery legs/knees. 

 The doctor had me lie down on the examining table while he examined me to make sure I was "surgery ready". Decided on a selfy shot of me laying on the table (this was a self-distraction tactic due to the doctor's cold, clammy hands on my stomach...yuck).

 Next I had to go to the lab across the hall to get some lab work done. Cupcake was quick to inform the phlebotomist that she had several patients at home (baby dolls). One that had already been diagnosed with "Squishy Monsteritis" (WTF...look, I have know idea where this kid comes up with this stuff...LOL) and several others who she was going to be diagnosing. She said "I need medical supplies, please"? The phlebotomist was great and hooked her up with swabs, cleaning clothes, band aids and cotton balls. I however did not fare as well...I got these HUGE swabs shoved up my nose and 3 tubes of blood drawn.

                        

 After leaving the doctor's office I decided I needed a stroll through the Farmer's Market . After all, you shouldn't waist such a beautiful Friday morning!

 

(Came across this stand at the market that sells only Organic...I'm in heaven)

 (Lots of healthy options)

 

 (Yummy and 100% Organic)

 (Loving this cute old couple holding hands through the market)

 Next I headed to my friends house to have a garage sale. It was a good day for a late season sale and we had a great turnout.

A lot of randomness today...trying to fit in as much as I can before Tuesday...today I did it all, with both feet still on the ground! :)

...nothing that you, me and a gallon of ice cream can't solve.

I woke up to a dreary, sad morning of thunderstorms. I was immediately disappointed because I wanted to walk my daughter to school and with the torrential downpour this was going to be impossible. 

(Wet, wet, wet morning view from my front door)

As we left the house to make the mile drive to school my 4 year old offered me her Dora The Explorer umbrella to use. In an instant I went from feeling bummed about not being able to walk to school to being thankful for the little things...the ability to hold an umbrella while walking.

(Here I am in action with the Dora umbrella)

This led me to think about all the other little things I need to be thankful for...of course the list is way to long to list in a blog posting, but here were just a few that crossed my mind this morning while doing the day to day stuff...

*Kneeling on the floor to iron (I have a standard size ironing board, I am just too lazy to get it out every morning) .

*Stepping in and out of the shower unassisted

 

*Walking into work holding an umbrella in one hand and carrying coffee in the other or just simply being able to carry coffee.

*Carrying laundry baskets

 

 *Carrying packages into the post office

 

 *Scrubbing my floors...Ok, so I don't exactly do this, but I am thankful I don't have to! :)

 

 By the time I got to work this morning I was truly in a spirit of thankfulness...but still feeling a little bit down (think it was just the gloomy day in general). I was handed a package that had arrived for me in the mail from one of my besties.

 My friend Laura has run so many of my races with me and even the ones she can't run, she comes to be my cheer section and support runner. She always knows just what to say, doesn't scare easy, even when I have gone off the deep end and always finds a way to lift my spirits.

I eagerly opened my package:

Because she knows this is my first instinct ;)

...a million more!

My zero calorie chocolate bars...this is how you make a girl look forward to post-op recovery!

Everything about her little package warmed my heart! Never under estimate the power of kind words and chocolate!!!!  

I am blessed and thankful for the wonderful gift of friendship!

The 3rd opinion...

Today I headed into the heart of Chicago for a 3rd opinion on the knee scandal. I know this is cutting it close, seeing as surgery is next Tuesday, but you can only get into see these people so fast. 

Arrived at the doctor's office and had to skillfully park my Xterra in the narrowest parking spot in the parking garage. 

Parking garage fares...Welcome to Chicago!

(Thanking my lucky stars I was parked under 2 hours and only had to pay $22.00)

While I waited in anticipation to see the surgeon who would render the verdict on my knee debotury, I decided to check out the rooms contents. Your usual examining table, chair & stool. The sink, soap, paper towels, the bio-hazard wastebasket, the latest copy of TV guide weekly & a box of non-latex gloves (boring).

Doing this was out...sigh.

Then I saw this...the plastic model of a knee. I decided to examine it a little closer and snap a few pictures of the different components that make up the knee (like I had anything better to do at this point).

Front of the knee

Front of the knee without the patella

The medial femoral condyle where I have a huge crater that the surgeon plans to remove and do a transplant.

          

 The back of the knee and the PCL (posterior cruciate ligament), which on my knee is torn.The surgeon will  reconstructed mine using a portion of my hamstring.

After finishing my examination of the knee I noticed this shoulder model as well and decided, what the heck, let me take a look at this bad boy too...

The surgeon finally graced me with his presence (actually he was quit nice and down to earth) and gave me his opinion on what he thought should be done. His opinion mirror surgeon 2's opinion on what form of action should be taken. So I am planning on going through with the surgery. 

His only difference of opinion was on post-op activity. In his words "you need to shift your expectations". I looked at him in bewilderment and asked what he meant. He believes I should have the surgery for the benefit of a semi-normal functioning knee but with the idea of finding a "new passion", a non-high impact passion. I swear to god, if I hear one more person say "Have you thought about cycling", I am going to knock out their teeth!!! Don't get me wrong, I appreciate his honesty and professional opinion, but I doubt he says this to the members of the Chicago Bears (he's one of the orthopedic surgeons for the Chicago Bears) who have multimillion dollar contracts on the line. For them its about their livelihood, their paycheck, I get it...but what about passion...he clearly doesn't understand PASSION. I am not going to endure the "Year of Hell" just so I can exist in life...I want to LIVE! Running is living for me!  Now that doesn't mean I am not open to other ideas/activities/sports, but I don't want, nor plan to give up running if I can help it. That is what my "Year of Hell" is for...the possibility of having both feet on the ground...RUNNING!

...everything but the hospital bed!

I got a call today from a medical supply company. They said my surgeon's office had notified them of my post-op needs and they needed to verify my insurance information so they could have everything I needed  ready in time for the BIG day! 

I verified my insurance information with them and then asked what exactly my doctor had requested that I receive...it appears that I am getting pretty much everything except the electric motorized hospital bed  

(which actually would have been fun for my kids...who am I kidding, I'd of had a blast with it).

Here is what I am having delivered to my house (not sure where it is all going to fit):

 A post-op knee brace

 CPM Machine 

(This will move my knee for me...effort free exercising...I could get used to this)

 Pneumatic Compression Machine 

(This is evidently to prevent blood clots)

 

Game Ready

 (Cold Therapy Compression System)

 

Mobilegs Crutches

 (These look interesting)

Last time I had knee surgery and had to be non-weight bearing for two months I used these AMAZING crutches:

 Hope Crutches

They are truly amazing and I cannot imagine having done those two months without them. They are easy to use, provide exceptional balance and allow you to move fast. On a scale of 1-10, 1 being standard crutches, I give the Hope Crutches a 10+. 

I still have the Hope crutches and plan on them being my go-to crutches for this surgery as well, but I am interested in seeing how the Mobileg crutches measure up to the Hope Crutches.

However, the comparing of crutches can wait a few more days...because today I still have both feet on the ground...running! 

One last HURRAH...

One of my besties asked me to accompany her on a mini weekend road trip to Indiana for a friends wedding. I immediately thought this would be a great opportunity to have one last HURRAH  in a pair of heels before surgery.

 

The venue location ended up being on a horse farm (not the ideal terrain for 4 inch heels).

 

 However, I was determined to party in my heels, while my girlfriend went with a more practical choice, fancy flat sandals. 

It was a wonderful mini road trip full of laughter, chatter, food, friends, music, late night pizza and the most amazing private fireworks display I have ever seen.

 I did it all with both feet still on the ground...in 4 inch heels!

 

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Surgery finally scheduled...

Both feet still on the ground! Got the call...surgery is finally scheduled. 11 days & counting (Sept 24, 2013)! Happy that today I was able to walk Morelia to school, push Cupcake in the stroller & run before/after work. Thankful for it all! :)

My new best friend...

 I finally got my PCL stabilizer brace (after waiting over 18 days for it because the doctors office, medical supply company and insurance company couldn't figure out who needed to do what, when or how...so f'ing annoying)...Anyway, I strapped on my new "best friend" and took Cupcake out in the jogger to give it a go. It was VERY painful and slow, but the brace kept my knee stable enough to run/walk 6 miles. YEAH!!!!!! I am so HAPPY...not a good time or distance compared to just 3 weeks ago...but I don't even care...I GOT TO RUN!!!!!

Looking forward to limping down the trail until the end of the month when I have my surgery. Not taking a single step for granted!

How it all went down...

After many years of running half and full marathons I decided this spring that I wanted to accomplish an Ultra. I set my eyes on the Fall 50 in Door County, Wisconsin and got to training. I sacrificed my summer to train my heart out for this race, following a training plan to the T and doing everything "right" when it came to rest days, stretching, strength training, hydration and nutrition.  

3 weeks ago, while on a training run I was stopped dead in my tracks by the worst pain I have ever felt, in my left knee. The short of it is I need surgery and will not be able to walk for 3 months post surgery followed by an additional 6-9 months of rehab, no high impact activities and NO RUNNING for 12 months!


Long story...I have an old PCL tear and medial femoral condyle cartilage injury from a 1997 figure skating accident. As PCL's tears are not usually fixed, they did nothing back in 1997. In 2007 I had surgery in an attempt to fix the medial femoral condyle injury and to cut out part of my meniscus that was torn. The surgery was unsuccessful and I have been getting by ever since (painful, but bearable) with lots of strength training to help with stability and being careful when I run to always calculate my step. 

The doctor is unable to explain why 3 weeks ago on a short training run, feeling great a mile and a half in, that one step was fine and the next was so incredibly painful (it felt like each step I took I was being stabbed in the center/medial of my knee with a knife). So although there appears to be no acute injury ( I had x-rays, an MRI and a CT Scan) my old injuries have finally got the best of me. The surgeon is going to construct a new PCL (using a portion of my hamstring) and resurface the femoral condyle with a donor cartilage implant. The cartilage implant is the reason for 3 months of non-weight bearing and 12 months of NO running. Its needs that time to heal.

Of course I am devastated (I want so desperately to run the Fall 50 Ultra). I have spent the last 3 weeks trying to regroup and figure out what my "plan" is going to be for the next year in order to stay fit and keep my sanity. Running is my passion, my sanity, my motivation and without it I feel lost. I also have a need to be in control, so having a plan makes me feel more in control of my situation.
 
The success rate for this surgery is 66% and there are no guarantees. I am banking on being able to run again and run pain free (that is the goal at least). However, I have been told by my surgeon that if the surgery is successful, the longevity of the implant depends on my activity level. If I return to long distance running, I may get 5 years. If I modify my activity (quit running), I could get 15 years out of my knee before needing knee replacement surgery.

 Of course I am not planning of giving up running (already gave up figure skating after my initial injury in 1997)...but I am open to trying new sports during my year away from running...and you never know, I might end up with a second passion!